21 August 2010
I don't know what does it. How my brain twists and turns and decides for all of me how the day will be. But to-day I am extremely bursting happy. The night before last I was extremely bursting sad. I cleaned a path for to pee at night by throwing things this way and that. Piles, mounds, mountains of things filled every space that wasn't my path. Søren woke up, sat up, big brown eyes looking at me. I went into the bedroom (he was in our bed) and laid down next to him. "Crying, mama? It's okay. Messy, Mama." " Yes, Søren." We went on to talk about how we would clean up toys. "I'm sorry Mama." I told him that it was an accumulation of things, not his toys, not my need for a path. He looked up, out of our window and complimented the tree. Then, "I love the tree, Mama. I love you, Mama. I love you." So many times then he said this. My face was streaked with tears. "Still crying, Mama? It's fine. Let's go to sleep." And with that he was asleep. I kissed his cheek as many times as he said I love you that night.
Walter and I must finish our masks and take photographs. Here is how I begin most of my photographs. A drawing.